I love taking care of my family. I believe being a wife and mother is my true calling. However, if something ever happened to me there are some very important things I desperately need my family to know. I feel like this is some of the most vital information I could pass on.
- How to change the toilet paper roll. When one roll is completely finished, when there is just no more paper on the roll you must throw the old one away and insert a new one onto the rod. It’s truly the only way to complete the circle of good hygiene.
- Where your shoes are. Hint: they are not in the place they are supposed to be…..don’t even look there, you won’t find them in the proper place. Do however look under beds, inside your dressers and atop the ceiling fan. Also you will never find a pair of shoes in the same room, so always check the whole house or the van…….where I told you not to leave them.
- What’s for dinner? This one is hard because sometimes I don’t always know, especially not when I am tucking you into bed or pouring your bowl of cereal. I do know there will be dinner, so stop asking.
- I want you to have confidence in yourself. To know you are truly capable of picking up the absolute disaster of a mess you just made all by yourself. You can do this, I believe in you.
- To know you have a special radar power. This power will ping of any missing object helping you to find it’s location. I use it often, usually to find your shoes. Well, this is not really for you boys, you somehow don’t develop this but don’t worry your wife will have it! You are welcome Keith for my supernatural finding ability.
- They have recently came out with a nifty invention called the clothes hamper. With this you are able to store your dirty clothes until you wash them. What??? This means you no longer have to leave them all over the house! Gamechanger.
- The magic table. I know you have all seen this video, if not watch it. It doesn’t vanish on it’s own guys…..it’s me……I do it! Please locate the nearest trashcan.
- The bathroom is not the perfect location to have bonding time. Please in your adult lives do not barge into bathrooms when people are doing their business. It is very important to wait to ask any important questions such as, “What are you doing?” or give a simple “hello” until after they have exited the bathroom.
- I love you with my whole heart. I love each of you very very very much, but also want you to pick ups after yourselves.
This is my list, not an all inclusive lists there are more I am sure. These may not even be the top 9 but they are definitely must know things. I actually wouldn’t mind them reading right now.